No Wonder Your Dog Hates You

 Some people shouldn't have dogs, some are dickheads, and some fall into the overlap of the Venn Diagram of the two.

The subdivision I live in is pretty massive, so it would follow there are a ton of families that own dogs.  So, at any one time during the day, you'll see a few others walking theirs.  An unwritten code exists on how to respond if you're walking your dog and you encounter someone else with a dog.  One of you will cross the street to avoid face to face canine encounters.  Not all dogs like other dogs; mine is one of those.  Typically, it's the party with the more agile dog (i.e. not a tiny dog).  The hot spot for dog walking is a common "park" area, where everyone will take a lap.  If you see a dog coming the opposite way, you follow their same path (clockwise or anticlockwise as the case may be).  This unwritten rule also applies if you're about to cross paths with a bunch of small children or parents with a baby stroller.  For the most part, everything works fine, with peace and tranquility being maintained.  

There are exceptions, however, and I encountered one today.  A guy in his late forties was walking his yellow lab-like dog.  Actually, to say he was walking it is being generous.  In reality, he was on his hands free, mostly dragging the dog along, and ignoring the dog, except to admonish it for stopping to sniff something.  You know, dog stuff.  Because of this, he shall be further known as Douchebag.  We were traveling in the same direction around the common area, with plenty of separation to prevent contact.  That is until his dog decided to lay down and wait for my dog.  Douchebag wouldn't move the dog and stood there continuing to talk on his phone, both staring me down and pretending to be aloof at the same time, defiantly playing alpha games.  Because Douchebag clearly had no intention of moving, I had to alter course around he and his dog.  We wound up so that both dogs were out of leash range of the other, which is good, because neither wanted to be friends with the other.  Needless to say, I wasn't pleased.  Also, this isn't the first time Douchebag has pulled that on me; I'd been able to avoid close contact, before.  

Because I'm all about making friends, as I was wrangling my dog, I informed the pot bellied piece of shit he was "a fucking dickhead".  This was followed by a few other choice words as I walked away.  The words had to be delivered to the side of his head, because he wouldn't look me in the eye.  

Honestly, I'm not even certain he understood what I said, because like most of my neighbors, he was Indian and was speaking Hindi on his phone.  But I'm sure he received the general message, solely from my tone.

Fucking douchebag...